A Working Actor's Lament (Chapter 22)
"Copy This!!!"
Three days.
Three long, frustrating days. How many more would there be?
Sure, on day one the sun was shining, the clouds were floating effortlessly above the homes and condos in Los Angeles, the air was a hot, but breezy, 83 degrees. However, the temperature would soon be rising in the actor's blood-boiling frame. There was no stopping it, and everyone in close proximity would feel the heat.
He had the answer to his problems...www.freewarefiles.com. Here he would find the program that would allow him to make copies of his film. Copies that would change the movie-making media as the world knew it. If only he had one clean copy in a format that could be used. He downloaded DVD2XviD 1.0.75 , which was supposed to convert his movie file into a format that could easily be read by his DVD Burning software. After 4 hours he figured he would try another program, one that wouldn't make him feel so stupid and incompetent. He tried again with the Avi2Dvd 0.4.4 Beta. This had to be better software, it was the pick of the litter from others who had downloaded before him. After an additional 5 hours pounding on his keyboard, he had given up hope. He would try again tomorrow, but this time at the local Fry's Electronics.
It amazed him and his wife when they walked down the aisles and aisles of software for the computer. He would surly be able to find something here, some 'golden egg' in this Willie Wonka store of electronics. Looking at box after box of DVD software, he started to realize that he may be way in over his head. He knew that Adobe made two programs, "Premiere Pro" and "Premiere Elements", that would be able to help, but both of these cost the same amount as a full tank of gas in Los Angeles...hundreds of dollars on a good day. Maybe his golden egg had not passed the test and was already in the incinerator with all the other bad eggs. Only the salesperson would know.
The pasty 'Fry' man stepped out from behind his counter. Either he was a vampire who loved indoor fluorescent lighting or he was a dungeon child who needed to attract UV rays in the worst way. The actor asked where the converting software could be and then followed the glowing white beacon of flesh back to the aisle he had just walked out from. His hopes began to fade. He had already searched every carton of software, looking over the labels for the answer that he needed, and had come up empty. What would this walking lighthouse tell him that he didn't already know?
"Did you know that you can download Premiere Pro and Elements free for 30 days from the Adobe website?"
That was all he had to hear. He grabbed his wife's hand and they flew back home to download more free software, only this time he knew it would work.
7 HOURS?!?!?!?!? That is how long it would take to download the 'free' software from Adobe. "Well," the actor thought, "I sleep for 5 hours, so I should start it two hours before I go to bed. Then the morning sun will shine upon me with love." He was becoming delusional, but no one could tell him differently. He clicked on the "download now" button and headed off to watch "The Incredibles" before bedtime.
At 5 am, he arose from his pillow and went over to his computer. Only 45 minutes left. He could shower, take his faithful dog, Max, outside and still have time to see if the newly added program to his harddrive would work. This was going to be a good day.
The 'loading' bar got to the end. It was done. He clicked on the zip file that had been sent to his desktop and installed the program. So far, so good. And then, there it was. The icon looked so beautiful. Blues and greens and reds all looking inviting, as if to say "click on me and I will take you to another world, a world of editing desires and converting dreams." He moved the cursor over the icon and with one click he was on his way...
The error message violently came across the screen, making the actor feel like he just ran his car through a huge billboard of pixels heading towards the void below. He click around and nothing was happening, just error message after error message. He thought he might find an answer to what was happening on the Adobe website and clicked to open a browser. It was then that reality came crashing down on him with no mercy. He realized that, sometime during the night, AT&T felt the need to disconnect his computer from the world wide web. He would have to start all over, another 7 hours, another leap of faith. He pushed the power button on his computer and watched the monitor's glow diminish to a small speck in the middle of the screen. "What a way to start the day," he thought to himself as he turned the key in the ignition and headed off to work.
As he sat at his cubicle under the fluorescent lights, he began to feel more and more like the 'Fry' guy and wondered if he looked just as pale. He had been beaten up and spit out like Ivander Holyfield's ear, but there was no one there to stitch him back together. He would have to fix this on his own. The more he thought about it, the more he was convinced the $40 that was quoted to him by the duplicating company a few days earlier didn't sound so bad. He would have paid $40 for piece of mind.
After work, with his tail between his legs, he walked into the duplicating office and put his credit card on the counter. He kept repeating to himself like a crazy man about to walk into the shrinks office, "Yes, this is worth every penny." One hour later, the 4000 pennies from his credit card account seemed to be enough weight to take off his shoulders. He floated home with one clean copy of his film...and without a care in the world.
Three days.
Three long, frustrating days. How many more would there be?
Sure, on day one the sun was shining, the clouds were floating effortlessly above the homes and condos in Los Angeles, the air was a hot, but breezy, 83 degrees. However, the temperature would soon be rising in the actor's blood-boiling frame. There was no stopping it, and everyone in close proximity would feel the heat.
He had the answer to his problems...www.freewarefiles.com. Here he would find the program that would allow him to make copies of his film. Copies that would change the movie-making media as the world knew it. If only he had one clean copy in a format that could be used. He downloaded DVD2XviD 1.0.75 , which was supposed to convert his movie file into a format that could easily be read by his DVD Burning software. After 4 hours he figured he would try another program, one that wouldn't make him feel so stupid and incompetent. He tried again with the Avi2Dvd 0.4.4 Beta. This had to be better software, it was the pick of the litter from others who had downloaded before him. After an additional 5 hours pounding on his keyboard, he had given up hope. He would try again tomorrow, but this time at the local Fry's Electronics.
It amazed him and his wife when they walked down the aisles and aisles of software for the computer. He would surly be able to find something here, some 'golden egg' in this Willie Wonka store of electronics. Looking at box after box of DVD software, he started to realize that he may be way in over his head. He knew that Adobe made two programs, "Premiere Pro" and "Premiere Elements", that would be able to help, but both of these cost the same amount as a full tank of gas in Los Angeles...hundreds of dollars on a good day. Maybe his golden egg had not passed the test and was already in the incinerator with all the other bad eggs. Only the salesperson would know.
The pasty 'Fry' man stepped out from behind his counter. Either he was a vampire who loved indoor fluorescent lighting or he was a dungeon child who needed to attract UV rays in the worst way. The actor asked where the converting software could be and then followed the glowing white beacon of flesh back to the aisle he had just walked out from. His hopes began to fade. He had already searched every carton of software, looking over the labels for the answer that he needed, and had come up empty. What would this walking lighthouse tell him that he didn't already know?
"Did you know that you can download Premiere Pro and Elements free for 30 days from the Adobe website?"
That was all he had to hear. He grabbed his wife's hand and they flew back home to download more free software, only this time he knew it would work.
7 HOURS?!?!?!?!? That is how long it would take to download the 'free' software from Adobe. "Well," the actor thought, "I sleep for 5 hours, so I should start it two hours before I go to bed. Then the morning sun will shine upon me with love." He was becoming delusional, but no one could tell him differently. He clicked on the "download now" button and headed off to watch "The Incredibles" before bedtime.
At 5 am, he arose from his pillow and went over to his computer. Only 45 minutes left. He could shower, take his faithful dog, Max, outside and still have time to see if the newly added program to his harddrive would work. This was going to be a good day.
The 'loading' bar got to the end. It was done. He clicked on the zip file that had been sent to his desktop and installed the program. So far, so good. And then, there it was. The icon looked so beautiful. Blues and greens and reds all looking inviting, as if to say "click on me and I will take you to another world, a world of editing desires and converting dreams." He moved the cursor over the icon and with one click he was on his way...
The error message violently came across the screen, making the actor feel like he just ran his car through a huge billboard of pixels heading towards the void below. He click around and nothing was happening, just error message after error message. He thought he might find an answer to what was happening on the Adobe website and clicked to open a browser. It was then that reality came crashing down on him with no mercy. He realized that, sometime during the night, AT&T felt the need to disconnect his computer from the world wide web. He would have to start all over, another 7 hours, another leap of faith. He pushed the power button on his computer and watched the monitor's glow diminish to a small speck in the middle of the screen. "What a way to start the day," he thought to himself as he turned the key in the ignition and headed off to work.
As he sat at his cubicle under the fluorescent lights, he began to feel more and more like the 'Fry' guy and wondered if he looked just as pale. He had been beaten up and spit out like Ivander Holyfield's ear, but there was no one there to stitch him back together. He would have to fix this on his own. The more he thought about it, the more he was convinced the $40 that was quoted to him by the duplicating company a few days earlier didn't sound so bad. He would have paid $40 for piece of mind.
After work, with his tail between his legs, he walked into the duplicating office and put his credit card on the counter. He kept repeating to himself like a crazy man about to walk into the shrinks office, "Yes, this is worth every penny." One hour later, the 4000 pennies from his credit card account seemed to be enough weight to take off his shoulders. He floated home with one clean copy of his film...and without a care in the world.
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