A Working Actor's Lament (Chapter 67)

Why, Dear God? Why?

The first drop took his breath away. Was this how it was supposed to be? As the actor held tight to the safety bar keeping him in his seat, he knew this was just the beginning of the ride. "Please let the coaster stay on the tracks", he pleaded...he just didn't know who he was pleading with.

He was dragging. Sure, it was 6:25 PM, but that was way too early to be feeling this tired. He could feel his body fighting the virus that had been spreading around his office for the past month. He had already taken his vitamins in hopes that would keep him well. Maybe he was losing the fight. Walking to his acting class, he passed the coffee shop, the one that had just opened a couple of months ago and beckoned him every Thursday night. He would succumb to it charms tonight.

As he opened the door and walked into the eclectic cafe, he reminisced on his one and only addiction: caffeine. Was he becoming an addict, or was it too late? He would have his answer by the time his blood shot eyes closed this night. As he ordered his Cafe Mocha, he wondered why the previous Coffee Frappaccino, 2 Diet Cokes and the Sugar Free Red Bull were not doing their jobs today. Paying the barista, he hoped this would get him through class.

Twenty five minutes later, he began to think about all the water that he hadn't ingested. Surely this was not a good thing to deprive his body of. He could toss the rest of the Mocha in the garbage and run next door to the local grocery and pick up a water before his acting teacher would even know he was gone. He ran, quicker than normal, over to the store. He thought to himself, "Wow, that Mocha really kicked in fast." As he opened the cooler door where the water was shelved, he realized that water with vitamins might just do the trick. His hand clasped around the bottle of liquid vitamins forgetting all about the previous multivitamin and Sugar Free Red Bull that had already loaded up his body with over 1,000,000% of the recommended daily dosage for the average human. What could 100% more do?

Getting back to class, he was confronted by a fellow student who wanted his information in case they wanted him for a future project. This was great. He was finally showing people out there what he could do and they were responding in a positive way. As he handed them his phone number, he was handed his sides by his teacher and proceeded to go outside and learn his lines. They were simple:

"Yes, I do"
"No, not at all"
"Thank you"

This was going to be a piece of cake. But what was this? A line with more than 4 words. The actor tried with all his might to try to memorize the line but every time he thought he had it, it would slip away. This was not normal. Why was this happening? "Alright, everyone back in," he heard the teacher say. The roller coaster had started it's downhill fall.

The first drop took his breath away. Was this how it was supposed to be? As the actor held tight to the safety bar keeping him in his seat, he knew this was just the beginning of the ride. "Please let the coaster stay on the tracks", he pleaded...he just didn't know who he was pleading with. He sat in his chair mumbling to himself the words on the page. Why could he not get these lines?

"Are you talking to yourself?"

"What?" he heard himself say to the actress to his right.

He was. He looked like a crazy man on the streets. He thought all he would need was an empty cup and a bird-infested beard and he would fit right in on Hollywood and Vine. Before he knew it, he was called to the front of the class. This was it. Was he ready? Was he going to remember his lines? Would he be able to make it around the sharp turn up ahead? He kept his hands up in the air for as long as he could, but the force of the turn was too much for him to handle.

He was thrown into the side of the roller coaster car when his scene partner step on his first line. It threw him so hard that he seemed to lose conscienceless or the coaster was in a tunnel for the next couple of lines. When he emerged from the darkness, he realized the line that was giving him all the trouble was upon him. He put his hands up in the air and decided to go along for the ride.

Watch out for that bird!!! BAM!!! That rail seems pretty close!!! SLAM!!! When did they add that turn??? POW!!! He was mangling the words worse than the coaster was mangling his body. If only he could end with his head intact.

As he pulled into the loading dock bruised and battered, he was on the verge of tears. How could this happen? All of the training he had over the years was missing. Memorization skills shot...confidence pulled from the recesses of his soul...

While the actor walked back to his chair, a mere shadow of a thespian, he caught the eye of the fellow classmate who had requested his phone number. As he sank into the corner of the room, he knew three things: He knew the phone call from his fellow student would not be in the near future, he knew he would have to prove to himself that he should still be in this town, and he knew he still had the one thing that would help him go on...

...he could still be dramatic.

A Working Actor's Lament (Chapter 66)

...And The Winner Honorable Mention Best Effort Goes To...

Was that the top of the hill? It was hard to tell as I was in the last row of the roller coaster. Surely this climb to the top wasn't over already.

So I was really excited for this morning to come. This was the day we were going to find out if the short film "Pirates of the Caribbean: At Wit's End" would be up for an MTV Movie Award for Best Spoof of a Film. As I typed in the address bar, I was sweating from my fingernails. I was just hoping it would not short out my keyboard before I finished.

There it was, the top 5 nominations: "Casino Royale with Cheese", "Texas Chainsaw Musical", "Texas Chainsaw Rehab", "Little Miss Squirt gun', and "United 300". But where was our short film? It had to have been up there. Okay, I will take it like a man...maybe it was under Honorable Mention: "Little Miss Jackass", "300 Pins", "Borats Anonymous", "The DeFarted", "Holiday Grudge", "300: Maximus Rectus", "The Number 2300", "301 Dalmatians". Nope. Really? Maybe I read them wrong. Nope. We were not there. Neither were any of the spoofs of "Pirates of the Caribbean".

To be honest (and partial), I have seen all of these movies and I can say that they are nowhere near the best that were in the competition. Am I saying the short film I was in was the best? Well, if not in the top 5, it should have definitely been mentioned as honorable. And to lose out to a film that didn't even play by the rules (no use of copy written music without permission) just makes it that much more infuriating.

I tried to hold my hands up as long as I could as the roller coaster slowly started to arc back down to earth. Let's just hope it was a short drop. Maybe I should close my eyes.

A Working Actor's Lament (Chapter 65)

What A Memory-al Weekend This Would Be

As the actor sat down and opened his 2.1 oz single-serving container of Frosted Flakes, he thought back to the last 4 days and how the roller coaster ride was almost coming to an end.

He had received a call from a feature film production company who was interested in him for the character of 'Bobby - Male, small but important role, Mid 20’s to early 30’s - The businessman behind Andy’s genius. Millionaire and in huge debt, has a family and kids. All ethnicity's.' He contacted the casting director who informed him they would like to see him at 11:00 AM in Santa Clarita on Friday. It was a good thing that the actor decided to take that Friday off. Sure, it was because his wife's birthday was that following Sunday and he thought it would be great to have a 4 day mini vacation with her. This wouldn't cut too much into their time, as it was only a 30 minute drive north.

Around the same time, he received an email from Shainna, the producer from the short film who had contacted him earlier in the week. She wanted him to come down to their studios in Newport Beach at 4:30 PM on Friday (yes, that same Friday), 57 miles to the south. Since there was plenty of time between the two appointments, he agreed, thinking he could maneuver around Memorial Day Traffic.

He went to his audition at 11:00 AM, actually arriving early. He was in and out and happy with his performance. Arriving back at home to take the dog out, he also could get a quick bite to eat and then off to loop his dialogue. At 3:00 PM he jumped in the car with his wife and off they went. Or so he thought. By 3:30, they had only traveled 5 of the 57 miles on their journey to Newport Beach. After a phone call to the director to inform him of the situation and getting their Yaris up to the maximum speed of 20 miles an hour, they finally arrived at the studio at 5:10 PM.

Looping went great...the crew was professional and it was painless. The one thing the actor was happy about was to see a rough copy of the film. He could not stop smiling as he knew this short would be making the festival rounds soon. He was also informed by the director that the short film his father had shot with this exact production company years before was going to be in the Boston Film Festival. Even though traffic was a pain and over 300 miles were added to the odometer, this day could not have gone any better.

Saturday came and went with no excitement, but Sunday was the day...the birth day. The actor had wanted to get tickets to "The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee" for a present. The original Broadway company was touring and he knew his wife liked the musical. However, with ticket prices at $140 a seat (later discounted to $86), he knew he would have to come up with another plan. Luckily, his wife wanted to go and see "Wicked" again. They would try for the lottery and hopefully be one of 26 front-row seat winners. When they arrived at the theater to stand in line, they noticed there was no line. The lottery had already taken place and they were a half hour late. The actor's wife talked to the Box Office and asked about "Putnam" playing at the sister theater across town, and if there were lottery tickets for that show. "No", the employee said, "but I can call over to that theater and see if they have 'rush' seats available" (seats that are released to the public one hour prior to curtain at a cheaper rate for any number of reasons). The actor's wife crossed her fingers in hopes for great birthday news.

"You do?" she heard the nice lady say. She hung up the phone and told the actor's wife that if they got there as soon as possible, the theater did offer rush seats but couldn't promise that there were any available for that particular show. She jumped back into the car where her husband was illegally parked and told him the news. He looked at the clock...they had about 20 minutes to get about 20 miles...could they do it. He hit the gas pedal and off they went. Nothing was going to stop them, not even Memorial Day traffic.

They arrived at the theater, paid the $7 for parking with no guarantee that they would even get any tickets, parked the car and ran to the BO Window. Mark, the man behind the glass partition gave them a big smile when they walked up, out of breath. "Rush tickets?" It was 12:02 PM. "Yes, we just started to offer them, let me see what I have." He pulled out a seating chart and slid it through the hole at the bottom of the window. "I have these right here," and pointed to the front row, center. "No way," the actor heard his wife say in disbelief. Mark said "Okay, well I also have these here in the back." Realizing that Mark had misinterpreted his wife, the actor quickly told Mark that the front row center would be fine. "Okay, then. That will be $28 per ticket." The situation could not have turned out better, the actor said to himself.

After the show, the actor took his wife out to dinner at Black Angus, thanks in part to their friends birthday present to his wife, and then headed home. As his wife laid her head on his lap to rest from the days activities, he knew this would definitely be a birthday to remember.

Monday morning, the last day of this Memorial Day, would start off with a bang. The actor's wife woke him with great news that was coming across the computer screen. They had just received an email telling them their short film, "Lucidity", was just accepted into the New Film Makers Festival in New York City. With all of the rejections over the past couple of months, this was the last submission they had planned and it paid off in spades. Come September 26th, 2007, they were going to be screened on both sides of the country.

The actor thought, "When would this roller coaster ever get back into the station." It had been going up for such a long time, he was just waiting for the first hill to take him down. When? When would that be coming? He still couldn't see the top of the hill, so he was hoping the drop was far in the distance. However, the higher he went, he realized the fall would be just as long.

A Working Actor's Lament (Chapter 64)

Poor, Poor Actors

I believe that most actors should take it upon themselves to check out as much industry productions, whether it be on the stage or in the movie theater. However, you know as well as I do (and every waiter and waitress out there) that unless you take out a second mortgage on your home, this is an impossibility. So I thought I would share some of the hidden secrets out there where it might only cost you a weeks worth of groceries to see some great stage shows (sorry, I can't help you with AMC).

1. 1. Half Price Ticket Sites Online - Sure, this isn't a great secret, but it is very helpful. If you plan ahead only a couple of days, you can go to these sites and get regular price tickets for about the price of a cheap sushi dinner. There are some stipulations on some of the sites (you don't know where your seats are until you pick up your tickets, you must register first), but who cares? You are going to see great theatre. Some of the more popular sites are TheatreLA, Goldstar Events, CeeLA, LA Stage Alliance, and Plays411.


2. The Lottery - No, I am not talking about MegaMillions or your local Super Lotto. I am talking about a wonderful thing that Jonathan Larson started with "Rent". If you call up your local theatre, ask them if they offer a lottery, where a couple of hours before the show you can stand it a line with your fellow peers in hopes of getting your name pulled for seats to the next performance. We have done this 3 times for "Wicked" at the Pantages Theater here in LA and have got in twice. Again, there are stipulations: for the Pantages, you have to pay cash ($25 per ticket) and you are only allowed 2 tickets, but ALL the tickets are for the FRONT ROW!!! Check with your local theater to see what their rules are pertaining to their lottery.


3. Rush Tickets - This is one where you really have to have luck on your side. Some theaters offer "Rush Tickets", which are tickets that, for arguments sake, are discounted seats that the house sells to fill up the theater. These could be anywhere within the house (recent cancellations, un-sold seats), and they are sold at a fraction of the price, too. Are you ready for the stipulations? The major one is most of these seats are not released until ONE HOUR before the show starts, if there are any released at all. At least with the lottery there are guaranteed seats you are fighting for. Here, there might not be any. However, to cheer you up, I will tell you I recently did rush tickets for "The 25th Annual Putnum County Spelling Bee" with the original Broadway cast out here in Brentwood at the Wadsworth Theatre and was lucky enough to get FRONT ROW CENTER. The tickets that are going online for $140 were sold 'rush' to us for $28 a piece. Can you say "Hell, Yeah!!!"?

I am sure there are many other ways to get great seats at cheap prices, and if you know of any please comment on this blog so others can know about it, too. We need more actors who are not series regulars to see who they are losing the acting jobs to (sorry, I couldn't resist).

A Working Actor's Lament (Chapter 63)

It Ain't Over 'til It's Over

As the actor sat in his stiff office chair behind the two monitors gleaming on his desktop, he sat back and took in the good news and fortune that had come his way. He grabbed his "Orange Bullet" of Rockstar Juiced and put it to his lips. Sure it was sweet to the taste, but nothing compared to the email that had graced his inbox just moments ago.

Remembering the back and forth correspondence with the director of "Based on a True Story", he had reserved himself to the idea that he would never see one inch of this film, a film he had been waiting for over 3 years. Sure, the director and his wife had a baby after initial shooting; sure he was working on other films, one in which his father was cast. But the script was great and the cast was even better. Why would this film be put on the back burner?

The recent email nixed that thought. Shaina, the director's wife (and producer) had written a short but sweet letter informing the actor that the film was still on. Because of the newborn, and life in general, the film was shelved with other projects, but now the time was there to finish this 'baby' and get it out there for the world to see. Inquiring about his time schedule, she needed the actor to come in and do some ADR (Automated Dialogue Replacement) and then the film would just need some little finishing touches to start submitting it to festivals. He agreed to come in when they needed him as a smile crossed his face.

Setting the 'Bullet' back on the coaster, he knew one thing; one thing he had been saying all year: 2007 was going to be his.

A Working Actor's Lament (Chapter 62)

1 Of 9729...I Am On My Way

After a harrowing weekend of driving about 350 miles around town, I arrived home on Sunday night and logged into MySpace. I was sure there would be a message from one of my 225 friends; "Just a quick hello", "Check out my new photos", "Are you single and horny?". Okay, that last one was a friend request from Sally in Wichita, Kansas who just happened to stumble across my page. She seemed friendly enough, no?

After deleting Sally (and weeping that there were no new messages), I started to check out the bulletins posted to my page. There was one that grabbed my eye, smacked it around, and popped it back in the socket. A casting director friend had been posting the numbers from a breakdown she had listed this past Thursday at 5:30 PM. Luckily, there was a role that I could send my P&R for:

Jeffrey: Male, early 40s, Caucasian. Frank's son. Overly cautious, fearful, sulky, a buzz-kill worrywart who is uncomfortable with his father's situation. He loves his family, but he's not the best communicator. (Think: Richard Schiff, Timothy Busfield, David Sutcliffe, Kevin Pollak.) LARGE SUPPORTING.

For the past two days, she was posting numbers from the submissions that have been coming across her computer monitor. This was the final one. Three days after posting, she was done taking submissions. The final tally?

Total submissions: 9729
Roles with most submissions: Paul: 2495 and Gretchen: 2592
Roles with fewest submissions: That Wilson Woman: 4, Ella: 26, and June: 30
Number of girls between the ages of 6 and 14 with the names Taylor, Hailey, or Madison: infinite (okay, okay, more like 300 or so, but whatever)
Number of agencies and management companies submitting: 399, plus Actors Access

Sure, looking over the data could make an actor want to give up acting, sell all his worldly possessions, move out of his apartment and live on the streets of Hollywood begging vacationers for any spare change so he could buy a bottle of Jack Daniels praying to find happiness in the final swig. But I digress.

No, that was not going to be me. I submitted for Jeffrey, and those numbers were not up there. Between the roles of Paul and Gretchen there were 5087 submissions out of 9729...52% of the head shots were already out of competition. Those are good odds. Plus, if you take out the other numbers the casting director posted from the total left and divide that by the other 11 roles in the breakdown, that was an average of 389 submissions per role. My odds were looking better and better.

Going back to look at the breakdowns, I realized that the characters of Paul and Gretchen were in their 20's and the roles that received the least submissions were characters in their 80's. Being that I am pushing 40 years old, it hit me that most of my competition had probably began to thin out from frustration of not being in their 20's anymore. It showed me that I am now in the demographic of actors who are giving up and finding other ways to make a living. It validated that if I stay persistent, I am going to finally get that break that I have been trying to get for over 15 years. Yes, my odds were getting better and better. I was going to make it.

It looks like I will be putting that bottle of Jack Daniels back on the shelf for another day...or another actor. I mean, who am I to deprive someone their happiness?

A Working Actor's Lament (Chapter 61)

On The Set...In The Sun

My friend had written a short film for the MTV Movie Awards where you spoof films that are nominated. He asked if I would be interested in helping out...well, of course, anything for MTV. It is a spoof on "Pirates of the Caribbean" and I play a PA who is way to eager about the awards the movie has been nominated for. Below are photos from the set. When it gets uploaded on MTV's site, please vote for us so we can go to the show. I have to meet X-ibit.

12 of 12 for May

Here we go again with the 12 of 12...enjoy.

TITLE: "No-Win Situation"

INT - BEDROOM - 8:02 AM

Today was a going to be a great day. Not because this was the day of the Revlon Run-Walk or KIIS-FM's Wango Tango...no. Although those were great reasons to get out of bed, this was going to be a great day because Sean would be seeing his face on the big screen at the Folsum Theater at Chapman University in the short film "Life Bingo" at 11 AM. He remembered how stoked he was seeing Robin's short film last week and that feeling returned when he opened his eyes this morning. After showering and getting ready, he noticed the baby birds that had nested just outside his kitchen window were not singing as loud. Was it because there were only 2 left out of the 5? Or maybe, just maybe, they knew something he did not.




INT - LIVING ROOM - 9:46 AM

Returning home from his daily weekend ritual of Starbucks and Western Bagel, he made sure he was prepared for this outing. Grabbing postcards to hand out (in that small case that someone would notice his work and sign him to a 3 year contract on the next big sitcom), he glanced down at Max who, in his canine wisdom, was telling him not to leave on this tragic day. Sean would ignore these signs, after all, what does a dog know? Plenty, indeed.

INT - CAR ON 5 SOUTH (GLENDALE, CA) - 10:15 AM

After sitting in 5 mile and hour traffic for a half hour, Sean began to realize the he was not smarter than the average dog or 2/5's of birds. Only traveling 4 of the 43 miles he had to cover, the blood started to flow through his body hotter than the sun on a solar eclipse. Realizing that made no sense, he asked Robin to pull out her Sync phone, jump on the Internet, and see if Google Maps could tell them where the hold up was. Was there an accident? Was there a Dodger Game? Was it all Max's fault? They would not find out. All they knew was for the next 5 miles they were not going to go much faster than the sun on a solar eclipse. As he pumped the brakes, he decided to never use that analogy again.



EXT - CHAPMAN UNIVERSITY (ANAHEIM, CA) - 11:07 AM

They had arrived with no time to spare. Sean parked the car and looked at the Marion Knott Studios; somewhere inside the festivities had started. He just hoped that his film was not first. Luck would still not be on his side. He exited the car and walked over to Robin's side where he heard her say "I know it's here." She was looking at the floor of the car for something but decided she would have time later. Little did she know, she would have a lot of time later. They ran into the building and found the screening room, and even though their film had started, Sean's scene had not been shown yet. He sat there watching, knowing that one day...he might actually be on time for something.

EXT - EL POLLO LOCO (ANAHEIM, CA) - 1:02 PM

Sitting through two additional short films, Sean turned around and noticed the director leaving with her family. This would be the time to leave, too. He met her in the lobby and congratulated her on a job well done. He was happy with the way the film turned out and would be getting his copy soon. Things were looking up, or so he thought. When Sean and Robin arrived back at there new Yaris, Robin began to look again at the floor of the car. She informed Sean that her phone was here but she couldn't find it. After looking throughout the 3 square feet of interior over twenty times and still not finding the phone, their heads began to pound from lack of nutrition. After they ate, they would surly find the phone.

With full belly's and more searching, they both decided that the phone was lost in the time/space continuum that was created by the sun's solar eclipse. Getting in the car, Sean did not realize that the traffic was not on his side. Was everyone returning from Wango Tango and the Revlon Run-Walk? He would have the next hour and a half to ponder this. All Sean could think about was "Damn that Max, why can't he talk?"



INT - BEDROOM - 3:05 PM

Arriving at home, exhausted by the combined 3 hours in the car, Sean realized that he still had not looked over the lines for the short film he would be shooting tomorrow. While Robin was on the phone with AT & T (the former Cingular) trying to figure out what to do with the 'lost phone' situation, Sean sat on the bed and tried his best to concentrate. This would be futile. He would need help, and that help would come in the form of...



INT - KITCHEN - 3:52 PM

...a Sugar-Free Red Bull. Downing the liquid caffeine did not help, it only made the solo tenor vocalist that was there before join the Mormon Tabernacle Choir in their rendition of "Bang Your Head" from Quiet Riot. It was not a pretty sound. He needed to clear his mind; he needed to get outside and get some fresh air.



EXT - BURBANK, CA - 4:14 PM

This was just what the doctor ordered. As he walked hand-in-hand with Robin (and hand-in-leash with Max), he took in all the beauty that was Burbank, California. Kids riding bikes, fellow dog owners walking their companions, yards that were quenching their thirst from the friendly sprinkler heads. Yes, the choir was still there, but their voices were melodic and peaceful...at least for the time being. He would head home, enjoy a nice meal and prepare for the evening; a relaxing evening with his wife and friend at a high school production of "Le Miserables" at 8 PM.



INT - CAR ON 405 SOUTH (LOS ANGELES, CA) - 6:16 PM

Jumping in their Yaris one more time, they would give themselves plenty of time to get to Culver City by 7 PM. In the back of Sean's mind, he could hear the vocalist start singing off-tune. After a smooth ride on the 101 North, he took the 405 South ramp. It was clear. He didn't understand why the vocalist was still singing a half-step flat. As they reached the top of the Foothill by The Getty Center, the whole choir joined in. Not only were they all singing a little flat, but they were all singing different songs. That was when Sean saw the red river of tail lights ahead. He screamed "I'M IN THE CARPOOL LANE!!! COME ON!!!" Another hour and a half in the car. By the time they arrived at the Starbucks to meet their friend, Sean was just counting the hours till this day would be over.

EXT - HAMILTON HIGH SCHOOL (CULVER CITY) - 7:34 PM

Here he was, out of the car. He couldn't believe that he was actually on time for something...and with 26 minutes to spare. They walked into the lobby, purchased their tickets and waited...and waited...and waited.



INT - HAMILTON HIGH SCHOOL (CULVER CITY) - 8:01 PM

And waited. As the tickets holders started to pile into the lobby, the doors to the theater were still closed. The undiagnosed claustrophobia started to set in as Sean's nerves became a little frazzled. When would the doors open? Where was the nearest fire escape? Why did he just pay $50 for a high school production? Just as the pores in his skin began to leak, the theater doors opened and I was transported into a world of war, prostitution and death. As he sat in seat J26, he thought about how much he missed high school.



INT - LIVING ROOM - 11:48 PM

Sean and Robin walked into their home and plopped onto the couch. Sure, they missed the first 18 minutes of SNL (with host Molly Shannon), but at least the day was almost over. As Sean propped his feet up on the coffee table and gazed at the pixels on the box in front of him, the soloist who was torturing him earlier sang a lullaby so sweet, it put him to sleep.

If you listen closely, you can hear him mumbling "This is going to be a great day".



ADDITIONAL PHOTO - "DREAMSCAPES"

Sean lay still on the bed, dreaming of how the previous day went down. Feeling like he was drowning, he looked toward the light above...a light that would save him...the light of a new tomorrow.

Robin and I Became Parents...Again

Over the past couple of days, Robin and I have noticed that there were tiny little "tweets" coming from the nest that was built just outside our kitchen window. Well, we finally saw some cute little heads popping out this past weekend. It is amazing what a couple of days and some wild birdseed can do for the growth of a bird. We have yet to name the 5 cuties that are scrunched into the one tiny nest and we probably won't since they will only forget about us once they leave...and they probably won't write or stop by, unless they need their laundry done or $100 for groceries. Ungrateful little pests.

I will miss them.

Here We Go Again

Well, it is March 31st all over again.

Once again, someone out here finds it funny to start a fire, only this time they decided to do it at the historical Griffith Park, home of the Observatory, the infamous Forest Lawn Cemetary and the LA Zoo. Not to mention that it is not a forest that is hundreds of miles from homes and civilization...the park is in our backyard. Once again, a blaze is set just miles from our apartment, but we are lucky since it is moving in the other direction. However, some people just are not that lucky. Once again, here are some of the photos I took from my balcony followed by an LA Times story posted online just an hour ago.



A suspected arson fire was set in Griffith Park today above the Greek Theatre and spread quickly to the northeastern section of the park, earlier threatening the Los Angeles Zoo and now threatening homes in Los Feliz, officials said.

A mandatory evacuation was ordered for the area north of Dundee Place. A shelter was set up at Marshall High School. At least 2,000 residents were without power in the area, according to a DWP spokesperson.

The Harding and Wilson municipal golf courses, Gene Autry Museum, Griffith Observatory, Griffith Park merry-go round as well as the zoo were evacuated earlier as the blaze grew to a little more than 200 acres of the city's largest park, according to the Los Angeles authorities, including the fire and recreation and parks departments.

By 7 p.m., L.A. Fire Chief Douglas Barry said, the fire was 30% contained.Barry said the terrain was so steep that the bulk of the firefighting was coming from the air. Fire officials said they had not yet decided if they would continue the air drops after sunset, which is typically the cutoff point for air operations.

"We're trying to get it knocked down before dark," Barry said. "We don't expect a lot of wind this evening."

"The dry brush and hot weather is creating difficult conditions for us," Los Angeles Deputy Fire Chief Mario Rueda had said earlier.

Arson investigators were interviewing a 20-year-old man who was hospitalized with severe burns and who they believe set the fire. The man told detectives that he was sitting in the hills above the Roosevelt golf course when he accidentally touched off the blaze, sources close to the investigation told The Times. Sources said they believe the fire was started with matches.

The man was transferred this evening from Hollywood Presbyterian Hospital to the Grossman Burn Center in Sherman Oaks, said Sarah Faden, spokeswoman for the Los Angels Police Department. He has not been booked or arrested.

A Working Actor's Lament (Chapter 60)

Premiere Screening of "Life Bingo"

I just found out the screening for the short film I did is premiering this coming Saturday. Now, I know it will not be a big thing with red carpets and paparazzi, but at least I will be able to mingle with some working actors and possibly Shohreh.

For those of you who are interested, here is the first run thru for the trailer. It doesn't have any title or ending credits, but it does give you a feel for what the short is about. Also, be patient as it is a big file and will take about 5 minutes to download to your computer (click on it then go get some coffee).

And, being that the screening is on May 12th, this should make for a great "12 of 12" this month.

Where, Oh Where, Has Customer Service Gone?

I have to tell you, I am a pretty easy going guy. You can bump into me while you are stepping backwards talking on your BlueTooth to your boyfriend/girlfriend in line at the local coffee shop waiting for your triple espresso shot, decaf, non-fat, easy-whip, white-chocolate mocha frappaccino and I will forgive you...hey, we all can't know our surroundings all the time. However, total incompetence really gets under my skin. Case in point:

Robin and I go to the same Starbucks at the same time every morning; if you wanted to rob us, just wait outside the Albertson's in Burbank at 6:10 just after Ryan Seacrest calls out for the next lucky person who will get their bills paid by KIIS-FM if they call in the next 30 minutes. But I have to warn you, if you get between me and the Starbucks just inside the grocery store doors, I am not responsible for my actions.

I mention this constant variable in our schedule because it has been going on for the past 5 years. In the past 9 months, competent employees and managers have moved on and been replaced by...well, total incompetence. Names would be changed to protect the incompetent but they weren't wearing name tags.

Robin and I order the most boring and easy drinks: I with my Grande Coffee Frap, No Whip and Robin with her Grande Ice Coffee in a Venti Cup with Extra Ice. Here is the breakdown of how to make our drinks:

• Robin's - Pour coffee into a cup, add ice to the top, put a lid on it, serve to customer.
• Sean's - Pour pre-made frap mix into blender, add ice, blend, pour into cup, put a lid on it, serve to customer.

We get rewarded for spending WAY too much money at this Starbucks by using our Albertson's 'Rewards Card', where for every $75 we spend, we receive a voucher for a free coffee drink (up to $5). Robin and I average about 7 free coffees a week. Today was the day to redeem my free coffee, so to stick it to Howard Shultz I always go for the Venti. Take that you evil genius of liquid caffeine.

As we walked up to the new barista (she had been there for over a month and had served us before, but looking into her eyes I could see she was still 'new'), we asked if they were still out of Frap mix since they were out the previous day and only had Frap Lite. She looked in the fridge and said they had some, so we asked for our "usual drinks". Noticing that meant nothing to her (still), I told her our drinks, but proceeded to inform her of my free voucher and to make mine a Venti. She grabbed the cups and rang us up. This is where it gets fun.

As the charges started to appear on the screen, I noticed she charged us the Venti price for Robin's Grande. She in turn replied, "Well, it's free so it doesn't matter." After she finished laughing at her joke, she corrected her mistake and then credited us on Robin's drink. I informed her since Robin's drink is less then mine, they have always credited my drink on our bill. I was staring at the deer, all that was missing was the headlights.

After the barista took a minute or three figuring out the correct discount, Robin headed over to the 'coffee station' and checked on the whole milk. In the past, she has opened it and the smell of raw eggs permeated the air. Today, it was questionable; there was a smell, but raw eggs was replaced with sour skunktail. The barista, finishing Robin's drink (Pour coffee into a cup, add ice to the top, put a lid on it) put her drink on the counter and started mine (Pour pre-made frap mix into blender, add ice, blend, pour into cup, put a lid on it). Robin, afraid of dysentery, decided to fore go the Whole Milk and blend Half-n-Half and Lowfat Milk to try and compensate. As the barista served my drink, I noticed it looked mighty small for a Venti...because it was a Grande. Robin looked at me and asked me if I wanted to let her know she screwed up. I said no, so we turned towards the outside as I took my first caffeine hit of the morning. Our barista felt like her job was not done unless she completely ruined my order; yes, she gave me a Frap Lite.

So this is how we started this morning...trying to get charged the correct amount for a Grande Iced Coffee and a free Venti Regular Frap and getting a free Grande Frap Lite while trying to combine Half-n-Half and Lowfat Milk to make Whole Milk that doesn't smell like sour skunktail. But, hey, my coffee was free so I guess "it doesn't matter".

April Showers Bring...

MAY FLOWERS!!!

Happy Spring Time!!!

Click here then click and drag your mouse over the black area. Have fun!!!

You Give 'Idol" A Good Name

For those nay-sayers out there who think that "American Idol" is not a talent show, you must have missed the May 1st performance of Blake Lewis' "You Give Love A Bad Name" from Bon Jovi. I have been a Bon Jovi fan for well over 20 years, so I was a little worried about what songs might have been butchered on this show. However, to my surprise, everyone really stepped up and shined in their own way. The best performance of the night was Blake, though. Check it out:

I am not sure if he will make it past the cut tonight, but at least he gave us this phenomenal rendition of a classic song.